Heterogeneity

This is Friends Church – Heterogeneity

I was sitting with a friend one day, chatting about this question “Who is Friends Church?” Funny question I know, but these are the things I talk about:)

And we went back and forth a bunch, and then the conversation drifted to something else. A few days later, I got an email from Tom highlighting this word:

Heterogeneity (het-uh-roh-jun-nee-i-tee)

One aspect of it’s semantic range is defined as follows by Dictionary.com:

composed of parts of different kinds; having widely dissimilar elements or constituents:
“The party was attended by a heterogeneous group of artists, politicians, and social climbers.”

And Tom was all excited. He said, “You guys are heterogenous.”

Now like you, heterogeneity hasn’t been part of my everyday speech, at least until this point. I was much more familiar with the opposite of heterogenous: homogenous.

I don’t know about your background (in fact that’s the very point of this post) but I grew up in a traditional evangelical church where when I sat on my pew (wooden bench for those not familiar with church seating jargon). When I looked to my left, or to my right, everyone I saw looked like me (white) but more importantly, believed what I believed.

We all thought the same things about God, about who Jesus was, about what the Bible is, and how to use it, about who we should be friends with, and how we should behave on Friday nights, and on and on.

We all agreed.

We were homogenous – the same.

But that’s not Friends Church.

If you sat in our comfy padded chairs and looked to the left and right of you, you might see mostly white people (that is something we really need to work on) but more importantly, the chances of seeing someone who believed what you believe, about anything in your spirituality is pretty unlikely.

We have atheists sitting next to theists.

We have religious conservatives sitting next to liberals.

We have people who have huge models about who Jesus was and what that means for us today, sitting next to someone who doesn’t believe there was ever a guy named Jesus.

You name the topic: spiritual experiences, songs that move them, ways of talking about spirituality, names for God/divine/More Than, ways of using the Bible, ways of not using the Bible, and on and on the list goes. Chances are the person sitting next to you, or down the row, might not agree with you. Further, they might completely disagree with you.

In my church growing up, and I’m guessing any of you who have backgrounds like me, you never even considered the person sitting next to you might not believe what you believe, never mind actually having to make space for that person and their beliefs to be there too.

That was unheard of.

Because most church groups are homogenous.

And we are heterogenous

We are all different.

I know for those who grew up in church, this feels odd. And in some cases, almost threatening.

You used to be smack dab in the middle of the group. As part of the group as anyone could be. And now, the group isn’t even a group that you could be smack dab in the middle of. So the feeling is either being out on your own, or outside of the group that has somehow moved on from you.

That’s a tough place to be…I don’t want to belittle that. It is tough.

This is the price we have to pay for being made up of people who don’t necessarily fit in other church groups.

We each have our own reasons,, but we probably couldn’t go to a big, homogenous church and be smack dab in the middle anymore, could we?

It’s tough I know.

And even though it’s tough, I want to ask you to think about that person sitting down the row from you. Who might believe different things. Who might have models of God vastly different from your own. I want you to take a moment and ask yourself, where else can they go? They can’t fit in other church groups either.

This is the only place they can be. This is the only place you can be.

They are making space for you by being open to things that don’t work for them, but work for you.

Can you make space for them?

Can you make space for me to say “More Than” instead of God on a Sunday because God triggers them?

Can you make room for music that moves them, but leaves you cold?

Can you make room for their differences?

Because if we can do that… we are all welcome in this melting pot we call Friends Church.

This crazy, beautiful, challenging, heterogenous place we all call home.

Next time something doesn’t fit with exactly who you are and what you like, take a moment and look to your left and to your right and ask yourself, is this the very thing that they need?

I’m proud of this heterogenous community that I call home! I couldn’t fit anywhere else either. Thanks for making space for me too!!

Vince